Gordon Brown, the ex-politician, famously described as “the clunking fist”, for his lack of subtlety and love of a doom-laden headline got more than he bargained for when he emerged from his self-imposed exile from the Scottish political scene to mutter some new unfounded scares about the future of the National Health Service in an independent Scotland.
It’s a classic distraction technique designed to divert attention from the mess that successive UK Governments (including his) have made of the NHS in England and Wales. The NHS in Scotland is a different organisation and responsibility lies with the Scottish Parliament. Thanks to the Scottish Government and the SNP in particular, it has resisted the attempts at privatisation we have seen south of the border.
Scottish twitter is well-versed in Mr Brown’s antics and proceeded to rip into him using the hashtag: #TweetLikeGordonBrown
Every jobby ‘would be a hedgehog’ in an independent Scotlandshire. #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— BBC Scotlandshire (@ScotlandshireGB) July 2, 2018
Gordon Brown: ” In an independent Scotland, Rick Astley would give you up”#TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Jamie McEwan (@arandombadger) July 2, 2018
In an independent Scotland, there will be no L’Oréal as you will not be worth it#TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Oor Deb🎗 (@homelesshorse) July 2, 2018
In an Independent Scotland every packet of Salt n Shake would be missing the wee blue bag.#tweetlikeGordonBrown
— Eric Abercrombie (@AbercrombieEric) July 2, 2018
Brown: The toilet roll ‘would always be finished’ in an independent Scotland. #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Colin Dunn (@Zarkwan) July 2, 2018
#TweetLikeGordonBrown In an independent #Scotland Dalgety Bay will be polluted with radioactive waste from WW2 that a #Scottish Prime Minister @OfficeGSBrown could have made the MoD clear up..oh…wait…
— X_Sticks (@X_Sticks_Real) July 2, 2018
Your shoes will come with only one lace in an independent scotland #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— scott henderson (@whoopscottie) July 2, 2018
In an independent Scotland there will be no shortbread as we will simply be short of bread. #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— lesleemax (@lesleeemax) July 2, 2018
In an independent Scotland we will only be able to afford 1 traffic cone for the Duke of Wellington statue , unlike remaining in the UK where we would PFI two , and pay for 5.#TweetLikeGordonBrown
— C Roberts (devolved for now) (@CRobertsonUK) July 2, 2018
Brown: There’d always be a ‘tiny bit of grit in your shoe’ in an independent Scotland. #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Colin Dunn (@Zarkwan) July 2, 2018
Your da will lose his Avon account in an independent Scotland.
— E Brown (@BRWombat) July 2, 2018
#TweetLikeGordonBrown Brown: An Independent Scotland will need to use cabbages for currency but they can’t use UK cabbages
— FH (@Indy2TheReturn) July 2, 2018
There will be twice the nettles, but no dock leaves in an independent Scotland #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Simon Morris #FBPE 🏴🇪🇺🇳🇿 (@gingereejit) July 2, 2018
In an independent Scotland, the wind will no longer be windy.
Instead, it will become volatile.
This would be an unreliable source of renewable energy.#TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Dougie🏴 (@DougieMacM) July 2, 2018
The Isle of Skye will “go rogue” and eat all the rest of the Hebrides in an independent Scotland.#TweetLikeGordonBrown
— E Brown (@BRWombat) July 2, 2018
Haggi will no longer have sonsie faces in an Independent Scotland #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Dr. Gordon Watson (@DrFlashWatson) July 2, 2018
#TweetLikeGordonBrown Walking 500 miles in Scotland would seem like 500 more in an independent Scotland.
— watty eyeballs (@wattyeyeballs) July 2, 2018
All revels will be coffee in an independent Scotland #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Mark Sutherland (@pipey75) July 2, 2018
The wind will change and your face will stay like that in an independent Scotland. #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Flood The Mainstream (@FloodTheMnstrm) July 2, 2018
#TweetLikeGordonBrown In an independent Scotland, pigeons will shite on you every time you sunbathe
— Oor Deb🎗 (@homelesshorse) July 2, 2018
Brown: Water from a turned on tap will always splash your pale trousers around the groin in an independent Scotland. #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Wylie Horn (@wyliehorn) July 2, 2018
Brown : Toast would always land “buttered side down” in an independent Scotland #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Jake Norm (@Jakegolspie) July 2, 2018
Brown: All video games 'would be 1977 Atari tennis' in an independent Scotland #TweetLikeGordonBrown https://t.co/itwfUm3oVp
— Robert Davidson (@R_Davidson1980) July 2, 2018
#TweetLikeGordonBrown In an Independent Scotland midges will be year round and have a penchant for biting bums so they are permanently itchy
— louise stewart (@louisestewartLs) July 2, 2018
In an independent Scotland, Shake 'n' Vac doesn't put the freshness back.
#TweetLikeGordonBrown— Whippets #FBSI #FBPE #FBGSM (@ArghWhippets) July 2, 2018
In an independent Scotland every fart will result in a follow through. #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Steve Clarke (@Gaudd) July 2, 2018
In an Independent Scotland oil will be undiscovered #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Oliver Plankton (@evolvingpeasant) July 2, 2018
In an Independent Scotland shortbread will be a Class A substance.#TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Ａｇｇｙ🕉 (@Aggykins7) July 2, 2018
If Scotland votes for Independence The Edinburgh Festival will up sticks and move to London ! #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Kevin Smyth 🏴 (@KevinSmyth10) July 2, 2018
You'll get something tae really greet aboot in an Independent Scotland.#TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Anna Banana (@Scottish_Banana) July 2, 2018
In an idependent Scotland the sun will never rise and the Gulf Stream will go back to where it came from #TweetLikeGordonBrown
— Dr Mireille Pouget #FBPE (@mireille_pouget) July 2, 2018
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